Top 10 Peter Kay Quotes with Jokes

• "Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones."
• "At the end of every party there is always a girl crying."
• "One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger."
• "Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl."
• "You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses."
• "Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school."
• "The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity."
• "Old women with mobile phones look wrong."
• "Every bloke has at some stage while taking a pee flushed half way through and then raced against the flush."
• "There’s no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when your hand or head is stuck in something."

Peter Kay Tickets are on sale now

After almost 5 years, Peter Kay returns to live stand-up comedy. Get your Peter Kay tickets for his 2010 stand-up comedy tour dates. PETER Kay is coming home - to the M.E.N. Arena. Tickets for the The Tour That Doesn't Tour Tour on April 27, 28, 29 and 30 2010 will go on sale tomorrow and if there is the expected massive demand for tickets, the shows may run into May. Kay told the M.E.N: "Playing the Arena is big deal to me, it feels like home, in fact I can almost see my house from the roof. I've a lot of history with the Arena, having worked there as a steward when it first opened in 1995 with Torvill & Dean to eventually performing the last night of my Mum Wants A Bungalow Tour there in 2003.
27/4/2010 - Peter Kay MEN Arena Tickets - Manchester, United Kingdom
28/4/2010 - Peter Kay MEN Arena Tickets - Manchester, United Kingdom
29/4/2010 - Peter Kay MEN Arena Tickets - Manchester, United Kingdom
30/4/2010 - Peter Kay MEN Arena Tickets - Manchester, United Kingdom

All Peter Kay Tickets are available on The Online Ticket Shop

Peter Kay Ticket Agents

There are a lot of ticket agents in the market who sells Peter Kay Tickets but not all of the are successful to provide Peter Kay Tickets . Among them only few ticket sellers are successful to deliver safe, secure and 100% guaranteed Peter Kay Tickets. The list of those ticket agents are as follows:-

• Ticket Master
• Sold Out Event Ticket
• The Online Ticket Shop
• Getmein
• The Online Ticket Exchange

Kay play a charity show for children

Comedian Peter Kay is to play a charity single for this year's Children in Need appeal, which he says has the potential to be "another Amarillo".

The as yet unnamed track will be accompanied by an all-star video featuring almost 100 famous faces.

Kay, 36, said making the video had been "a real labour of love".

The comedian's cover version of Tony Christie's Is This the Way to Amarillo, launched in aid of Comic Relief, was the UK's best-selling single of 2005.

He went on to release two more charity singles, raising funds for Comic Relief and the NSPCC.

Peter Kay Public's Demand Down the websites

DEMAND for tickets for Peter Kay's new 'tour' crashed websites earlier today.

Millions of fans covered the M.E.N. Arena and Peter's all ticket websites after the Bolton comedian announced in the M.E.N. his long awaited return to stand-up.

He will play wholly at the Arena next spring in what will be his only shows of 2010.

A spokesman for the M.E.N Arena said: "We always knew this morning's announcement was going to be huge and, even though we'd taken every precaution to make sure both ours and Peter's websites would be ready for the enquiries, we've been blown away by just how big this news is.

"We're now happy to report that all the sites are back online and we're more than prepared for tickets going on sale tomorrow morning."

Tickets for the 'The Tour That Doesn't Tour Tour' which takes place from April 27-30 go on sale at 11am tomorrow priced ?35
All Peter Kay Tickets are available on The Online Ticket Shop.

Peter Kay 2010 Dates have announced

Peter Kay new tour dates announced for 2009. Peter will Menchester for four nights in his long-awaited return to stand-up comedy after a break of almost seven years. Peter will present his The Tour That Doesn’t Tour – Tour at the MEN Arena on April 27 to 30 next year, Tickets will go on sale to the public at 11am tomorrow. New tour dates has announced

All Peter Kay Tickets are available on The Online Ticket Shop.

Peter Kay Productions

Kay's TV project was the first episode of New Voices, a comedy series which showcased up and coming aptitude. His episode, "Two Minutes", written by Johanne McAndrew, saw him play a getaway driver as two of his mates effort to rob a pub of its takings. This was televised in 1997. After coming into view on BBC2's The Sunday Show showing his own slot entitled "Peter Kay's World of Entertainment", Kay made an episode of Channel 4's The Comedy Lab, "The Services", in 1998. This served as a pilot for the later That Peter Kay Thing. His idea for this series was to make a test bed for ideas and concepts that he could later use within other sequences. The idea of having many characters all played by himself was something with which Kay experimented.

His productions are as follows:-

• That Peter Kay Thing


• Phoenix Nights


• Max & Paddy's Road to Nowhere


• Advertising


• Books


• Stage shows


• Guest appearances


• Theatre work


• Talk shows

Peter Kay Criticism

Despite having co-written Phoenix Nights with Dave Spikey & Neil Fitzmaurice, Fitzmaurice spoke of his displeasure with Kay taking sole credit when he absent their names off the script book. “I can only presume they took out all the bits Neil (sic) and I wrote,” Fitzmaurice said. Kay was also nominated for a book prize alone. Fitzmaurice added
"The only way I can explain it is that people are affected by fame in different ways. It was basically about a lack of respect, a lack of recognition for me and Dave."
Spikey also criticised Max and Paddy saying "Hate to say it but pretty obvious, blatant, unsophisticated comedy for me. But, hey what do I know? It did very well and got nominated for a National TV award so I must be in the minority."
In 2001, there was criticism of Kay following his depiction in both That Peter Kay Thing and Phoenix Nights (series one) of a fire safety officer called Keith Lard. The character seemed to have resemblances to a real-life fire safety officer called Keith Laird. Although the similarity was dismissed as coincidental, Channel 4 were forced to offer an apology and financial compensation to Mr Laird

Peter Kay Filmography

• New Voices [episode "Two Minutes"] (1997)
• Coronation Street (Shopfitter) (1997)
• Comedy Lab [episode "The Services"] (1998)
• Butterfly Collectors (Ronnie) (1999)
• Live at the Top of the Tower (2000)
• Going Off Big Time (Flipper) (2000)
• That Peter Kay Thing (2000)
• Blow Dry (Cyril The Bar Man) (2001)
• Phoenix Nights (2001-2002)
• 24 Hour Party People (Don Tonay - Club owner) (2002)
• Live at the Bolton Albert Halls (2003)
• Roddy Smythe Investigates... (2003)
• Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere (2004)
• Coronation Street (Eric Gartside) (2004)
• Live at the Manchester Arena (2005)
• The League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse (2005)
• Peter Kay: Driven to Distraction (2005)
• Max and Paddy's Power of Two (2005)
• Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (PC MacIntosh) (2005)
• The Catherine Tate Show (Guest Star) (2005)
• Doctor Who - Love & Monsters (Aired 17 June 2006)
• Little Britain Abroad (Christmas 2006 Specials)
• Comic Relief Does Little Britain Live (DVD) (2007)
• Peter Kay - Stand Up UKay (DVD) (2007)
• Roary the Racing Car (Voice Over (Big Chris)) (2007-present)
• Britain's Got the Pop Factor... and Possibly a New Celebrity Jesus Christ Soapstar Superstar Strictly On Ice (2008)
• Geraldine - The Winners Story (2008)
• Special Kay (DVD) (2008)
• Take That Come To Town as Geraldine McQueen (2008)

Petery Kay Singles

Year	Song	UK Singles Chart	UK Download Chart	Irish Singles Chart
2005	"Is This the Way to Amarillo" (Tony Christie feat. Peter Kay)	1	1	1
2006	"Sleep" (With Texas)	6	—	—
2007	"I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" (as Brian Potter, with The Proclaimers and Andy Pipkin)	1	1	—
2008	"The Winner's Song" 1	2	5	—
	"Once Upon A Christmas Song" 1	5	4	35
2009	TBA (With TBA)	—	—	—

Peter Kay Picture Gallery

Introduction To Peter Kay

After finishing Mount St Joseph High School, Kay took quite a lot of menial jobs, including working in a toilet roll factory, Netto supermarket, Cash and Carry, and a bingo hall, which afterwards inspired episodes or series in That Peter Kay Thing. He was presented at the University of Salford where he learned a Higher National Diploma in Media Performance. This engaged a stand-up course at which he excelled. His first stand-up was a opposition in Manchester, hosted by later co-star and co-writer of Phoenix Nights, Dave Spikey. Peter was last on the bill and won the contest, beating fellow stand-up comedian Johnny Vegas.

Kay’s knowledge working at the MEN Arena inspired him to wear the official yellow jacket of the MEN Arena for the final show of his Mum Wants a Bungalow tour. Kay has said that he sought a career in comedy. During his time working as a cinema usher, he experimented with stand-up, participating in several local events, as well as others at the Comedy Store in Manchester. After losing his job at the cinema, Kay was presented with the choice between finding another unskilled job or moving into comedy. After being told by several of his family that he was talented, he chose stand-up. Kay also states that he became a comedian partly to clear debt - though this is believed to be a joke, referring only to the fact that he was out of work.